Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Java vs java

In the way of a more light-hearted language post, here is my comparison of Java (the language) with java (the beverage).

To begin with they are both dark voids from which no light can escape and quite bitter in flavor. Both gained popularity for primarily political reasons. One often must add (syntactic) sugar to make them palatable. Looking on Wikipedia for symptoms of overuse, we find even more similarities. Prolonged use can lead to dependency, nervousness, irritability, anxiety, twitching, insomnia, headaches, heart palpitations and ulcers. In addition, acute overdose results in similar effects to prolonged use with the addtion of: a rambling flow of thought and speech, mania, depression, lapses in judgement, disorientation, disinhibition, delusions, hallucinations and psychosis. In fact, the primary difference I can find between the two is that overdoses of one lead directly to death, while overdoses of the other will only do so indirectly.